Friendship

I think that one of the hardest things about leaving college was the lack of deep friendships here.  I didn't realize it at first because I was always surrounded by such great people and because I still had my roommate, but the truth was that no matter how much I liked my new friends or how much they liked me, we didn't share a history. We might have shared interests, or hobbies, or enjoying the company of each other, but we didn't really know what the other had been through.  We had never seen the other truly hurting, nor did we know what made the other deliriously happy.  For a time all these friendships were endlessly good, but lacked a certain depth.

In school, this depth came quickly.  When you see each other daily, it doesn't take long to get to know each other.  When you feel like you miss someone because you didn't run into them for several hours one day, you quickly learn to value them. When you live down the hall or across the pond from them, you learn to forget about the fights and forgive easily.  When you eat lunch in the same place, with the same people, every day, you begin to consider them family.  All this happens quickly.  Before the shininess of a new friendship wears off, the roots of a deep, meaningful relationship have been set.  Not so much in what we like to call the "real world."  In this world outside of dorm life, things take longer.  Sometimes the excitement of the newness wears off before unconditional trust kicks in. In that gap is where forever friends are won or lost.  Its harder to get past this point, and lonelier.

This weekend, however, I was reminded of something.  I know some great people.  And the great part about them is that I have realized that two years have passed and these friendships have gone deep.  I feel a sense of family-ness when I am around them, just like in college.  But unlike college, I also have ample opportunity to meet new people constantly.  The trip I went on this weekend had every stage of friendship imaginable. My roommates, who I trust completely.  Friends I've known longer that two years, but only since moving here have become close. Two year old friends who have become brothers and sisters.  One-year old friends who have passed the shallow-friend stage.  Months old friends who are a delight to be around.  Even a brand new friend who I met as we loaded the cars to leave.  My grandpa had the chance to meet these people and kept telling me what an awesome group of friends I have.  I have to admit that I agree completely.

So thank you to all my friends.  Whether you went on this trip or not, or if you are a stage 1 friend or a stage 47 friend, thank you.  You make my life so much richer and more wonderful and I look forward to seeing where our friendship will take us.